compassion, Kindness, Mindfulness, Mindset

The Only Sure Path To Happiness: And The Biggest Mistake Most People Make When it Comes To Making Others Happy

“Why should my happiness depend on the thoughts going on in someone else’s head?”

– Ralph Waldo Emerson

I didn’t always understand this.

I grew up in a world that promoted caring so much about others opinions. Caring about fitting in at school. Caring about fitting in with co-workers at the new job.

I used to adopt this mindset too.

I cared a little too much about what others thought of me.

So much so that I would stuff my opinion to prevent any friction.

This Mindset Becomes Rooted in Our Subconscious.

Before long, we stuff our truth and change who we are just to fit without thinking too much of it…

It becomes a natural reaction.

It took me a long time to break free from this mindset (Still not perfect, but I’m working on it).

To understand that I’m my own human and my happiness should not depend on what other think of me. What their perceptions are. Or their pre-conceived notions.

It is only their perspective after all.

Perspective is Only Perspective.

Not absolute truth.

Maybe that persons truth… but it’s not mine.

And so, no one, not you or I, should have to change themselves or hide their opinions just to fit in. To care about what someone else thinks. To make that person happy.

You deserve to be you.

And I deserve to be me.

That is the only real path to happiness…

Being Our Authentic Selves.

With love,

Miss T.

Health / Wellness, Mental health, Mindfulness, Mindset, Stress / Anxiety, Uncategorized

How to Live a Happier Life with this Mind-Blowing Mindset Shift

Do you struggle to find happiness in each day?

Are you always thinking:

“I wish life was easier.. I wish I had a better job…. I wish I could be happy…
I wish… I wish… I wish…”

Then you, my friend, are living in ‘The Gap.’

What is this Gap, you ask?

‘The Gap’, described by author Dan Sullivan, is this constant comparison we have of ourselves to our future, our goals, our ideals.

Unfortunately, when we are always comparing ourselves to where we want to be some day, we are spotlighting this gap.. of all we don’t have.

It’s too easy for us to get stuck in this cycle of thinking.

It’s easy because we are natural goal setters.

We work towards goals and strive for success.

And while setting goals is not a bad thing, if we are only measuring ourselves to our future goals, we will only see ‘the Gap.’

This can have detrimental effects on our happiness and well-being.

Here is what we need to do:
Shift our mindset from ‘The Gap’ to ‘The Gain’

‘The Gain’ is the opposite of ‘The Gap’.

Instead of measuring forward, we measure backwards. We can look back in time and measure our current selves to our old selves.

We are able to see how far we’ve already come.

We aren’t measuring ourselves to something external. We are shifting inward.

Now, don’t get discouraged is you find yourself in ‘The Gap’ from time to time…

Awareness of this mindset is key!

Awareness means we have the ability to choose another thought. Another mindset.

Awareness of ‘The Gap’, allows us to shift into ‘The Gain’!

To remind ourselves of our progress. Of how far we’ve already come.

To appreciate the experiences we’ve had and lessons learnt from those experiences.

To start thinking:

“Look how far I’ve come… I am grateful for where I am on this journey…
I’m grateful for all the lessons I’ve learned…. I’m grateful…. I’m grateful…. I’m grateful…”

Only by making this shift to see ‘The Gain’, can we be happy now.

Remember:

“Happiness is where you start, not where you finish…”

With love,

Miss T.